CHILDCARE: A SUGGESTED STRATEGY FOR TOILET TRAINING
If the child passes a bowel movement into the potty, praise him profusely. However, it is then important not to give him the idea that he is expected to do this every time. Revert back to the low key suggestion that he sit on the potty, and don’t be distressed if, after initially delivering the goods, he then resists or doesn’t do it again for a long time. This is a crucial stage, for if the child suddenly becomes aware of just how much this miserable bowel action means to his parents, then he just may realise at the same time the sort of power he wields.
Once this process has taken place, at some stage the child will begin to use the potty regularly, initially for faeces and then soon after for urine, at which point the child is essentially toilet trained. However, parents must expect that it may not go so smoothly — there may well be stops and starts, as well as frequent accidents. Again, it is important to be relaxed and low key about these as well.
There are several other points that are worth emphasising:
1. Never punish your child for any ‘mistakes’ in toilet training, or to subsequent accidents, no matter how frustrating they are to you. This will only make matters worse, and will most likely delay the completion of successful toilet training. Praise and encouragement are always a much better strategy, not only for toilet training but in all interactions with children.
2. Let the completion of toilet training be the child’s accomplishment rather than yours. You can share his pride, but it is important to allow your child to determine the timing and the pace of his toilet training.
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